Friday, 21 September 2007

The Great Kitchen Disaster of '07

Ah yes, yet another case of absolutely shameful goings on behind the scenes at the school. Yet this tale of woeful mishap wasn't based in the school offices. Today, it all occured within the school kitchen - which has fairly recently been totally remodelled.

The main cause of the disaster is unknown - but it is more than likely to involve a foolish lunchlady (woops, sorry, now known as a "lunchtime supervisory assistant") or severely botched ceiling work. The following is known - the kitchen was flooded, meaning no food could be provided - it was described, in the headteacher's own words, as "Contaminated water on the floors" - which, a specialist Foolish-to-English translator claims, means "Woops, some moron spilt a sewage pipe all over our brand new kitchen". Whether this is true remains to be seen, but all I know is that the school dealt with this disaster (which was likely caused by them solely) in a rather foolish manner.

By employing the cheapest and most incompetant drainage company to fix the problem, the school thought all their problems would be solved. But seriously - I've never seen a company drain a flooded dirty kitchen using a hosepipe before. But then, when the company is called Easaway (oh, how I cried upon reading that), and their slogan is 'we drain things', what can one come to expect?

The headteacher, of course, looked as pathetic as ever. Wearing a coat longer than himself, and sporting the classic 'I-have-no-idea-what-I'm-doing' look, he looked rather nervous as I, and another blogger from Templar Truths, questionned him on what had actually happened. But I suppose it's only the latest in a long line of disasters for the man who leads our school.

Below are a few other facts and events that have conspired since he joined us in January.

1. A huge fire, which also destroyed a tree and a neighbouring house's conservatory.
2. A Chlorine Spill that endangered thousands of lifes (caused by idiotic workers)
3. The suicide of a younger pupil at the school.
4. Ambulances were called into school no less than FIVE TIMES between him taking over as headteacher and the end of the school year in early July. (No ambulances were called in the earlier part of the school year, whilst Mr Sheriff was in charge)
5. Smoking has increased amongst students.
6. Younger pupils have been seen openly exchanging what appeared to be drugs just outside school premises. (Teachers, stood just feet away, said nothing.)
7. The school builing project has fallen vastly behind.

And those listed are just the more notable occurances.

Added to this, nicknamed the Great Kitchen Disaster of '07, one has to wonder - how has he kept his job?

The school dealt with this latest disaster ineptly, as always, but maybe we wouldn't have such bad luck without our current headteacher? If one believes in such things, could he perhaps be a jinx?

More information on the cause of the GKD as we get it.

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