School Closure

Hopefully, we'll do a slightly better job of informing students about this than the school did.

On Thursday 24th, the school will be closed for students in Years 7 - 11 due to the NUT teachers strike. NUT, whilst it may be hilariously apt, is in fact the name of the union; not a remark about the teachers going on strike.

Whilst Sixth Form will still be, as far as we're aware, required to attend on this day, most of us will have a day to ourselves.

However, whilst on the matter, the school's means of informing it's pupils today was rather dire. Letters were sent around during the last period of today but, unfortunately, they apparently did not reach all classes. Meaning that some people left school today blissfully unaware of the strike. Luckily, Templar Truths is here to do it's duty to the pupils of this school and inform them in a way the school itself failed to do. To those who could potentially have gone through the weekend without knowing, and not been informed until next week, it's a bit too short notice. So please, Temple Moor - especially since this is nowhere near the first time you have failed to inform pupils of important information such as this - try to send letters around a few hours earlier. Maybe then, they'll be time for everyone to be informed.

So start making plans for your day off. Make the most of it, by Friday we return the bowels of hell.

The Real life "Ceiling Cat".

Now i've heard some fairly bizzare stories in temple moor, things that confuse and bewilder the mind but no story has ever made me laugh so much as the story of the real life "ceiling cat". Apparently a certain teacher was just getting into his room at about 7:30 when suddenly one of the ceiling panels came crashing down onto one of the desks, a seemingly normal accurance in the world of temple moor as they are always trying to kill us, however when this particular teacher went to see what the damage was, to his suprise what he found insted of a broken roof tile crumpled were some small child would be sat in about and hours time was a hissing, spitting cat. No work of a lie this cat was so angry it tried to jump back up into the roof hole. After many attemps of catching this cat, some other person im not sure who went and got a coat and threw it over the cat, grabbed it and took it outside. I dont know about you but i have this awesome mental image of a teacher wrestling with a cat like you would a crocodile...made me lol!!
I need to find this cat and give it a medal its really is the real life "ceiling cat".

Strike?

April 24 is a date of your diary (if you have a diary - surely you must have some sort of planner, regardless of how awful they might be...). NUT - a teaching union (but not the only one) - are getting its members to strike.

It's the first strike for twenty years, and is happening because the teachers are fed up with their pay. Apparently the government are stopping teachers' pay being affected by inflation. Unsurprisingly, they're not happy. You see, people want money if they're going to be subjected to chlorine gas.

But never mind what the teachers want. What does it mean for Temple Moor? Well, we've had a tip-off that about thirty staff are NUT members. This isn't a majority, but it's a fairly substantial amount. However, it's unlikely that Temple Moor will be shut (BSF disaster pending). So you can expect supply teachers to descend en masse.
Update: Apparently they can't hire lots of supply teachers. A day off is looking very likely indeed, which can only be good news.

2 + 2 = 5

Next week is going to be "maths focus week". Now, if you remember uniform focus week, you'll remember that for every lesson we got a stamp, which lead to plenty of credits all round.

But - and many will be thankful for this - we don't have maths every lesson. So instead, every maths stamp (with its new pi design, a huge improvement on the previous cross) will actually be worth a credit. That's big credit opportunities, but does anyone care?

During the uniform week, people had tucked-in shirts, ties done up and the like. The week after - which was the start of a new term - no-one had carried over this habit. The bribes don't work. Regardless, the maths department is (presumably) hoping this will lead to some sort of mathematics revolution with all children embracing the problems of Pythagoras or the trick of trigonometry. I have a feel that nothing of the sort will happen.

Incidentally, one teacher said we should all search YouTube for "maths songs". Well, in the interests of our readership, I did. Here's one that came up called "I Hate Maths". Enjoy:

Water fiasco!

We do love Yorkshire Water. They've only gone and cocked everything up - to BSF-esque standards. In fact, they've cut off the school's water supply.

Why? I don't know. Perhaps they want us all to die of dehydration. Perhaps it's a mercy killing? All we at Templar Truths know is that our school has been closed. And we couldn't be happier. It's all down to everyone's least favourite thing ever...Health and Safety. But this time the overprotective nannies of Britain have gone and secured us an earlier departure from the pits of hell.

However, we might be back tomorrow. If not, that's epic. If we are, then someone's actually gone and fixed it which is a bloody miracle!

Update: apparently it's all down to a burst pipe, an incident which occurred at half past eleven. Will this disaster (the latest in a seemingly never-ending series) impact on this month's poll on the builders? The BSF chaps need to start giving us money or they've not got a lot going for them in terms of support.

Business as usual

Now school is set to recommence, after an unbearable two weeks away from our beloved establishment (cough), we just wish to remind you all that the blog is still going strong. Comprised mainly of elder school pupils (or are we?), there's not long left for us until Study Leave (for those of us lucky enough to get study leave). Meaning that, in a few week's time, we'll be gone, and will have nothing to blog about. So if we're going to keep the public up to date with the horror that can be life at our precious school, we're going to rely on your contributions. The email address, which you can find just down the page if you look, is templemoorhighblog@hotmail.co.uk .

And, since we don't have much longer, we're going to have to make the most. So for the remaining few weeks we have at the school, we're not going to miss a beat. Every time a teacher swears, a substitute finds himself way over his head, or the builders endanger all of our lives by puncturing a tank of poisonous gas, we'll be there to report on it. Yeah, we're sad, we know.

Oh, and since some of the teachers happen to have started forming guesses over precisely who is who on this blog... We thought we'd shake things up again. Who am I, Idle Idol? Or am I only one person? In fact, who is using which accounts at all? For that matter, do we still have the same contributors we had, say, a few months back? You work it out... if you can. Heck, who says I'm not a new member?

Or maybe I'm telling people this to confuse them and lead them in the wrong directions. All I can say is that we've had a behind the scenes shake up to protect our air of mystique. Enjoy.

Monthly Roundup

OK, it might be midway through Easter, but here are the small bits of information we haven't posted this month, but that may be of interest. Plus the latest poll results!

• The overall winner of the 2009 production vote is Blues Brothers, with 19 votes of 61. High School Musical came second with 16 votes. Either the student body of TMHS are mental, or it's a joke. We hope it's the latter.
• In case you hadn't noticed, we can now be accessed via www.templartruths.com - you can expect this URL to cause Internet Explorer to shut down by the time we're back at school.
• In the last monthly roundup, you may remember that we ran a competition: submit a piece of writing and if it's the best, you get a permanent writing job on this blog. We received no contributions at all. So don't blame us if this blog languishes un-updated in cyberspace...
• We did receive many emails from nice Nigerian men with $2,000,000 to give us. Happy days!
• The Little Shop website is still up - and those "coming shortly" links still aren't there.

That's actually just about it - news has been slow this month. But here's that April Fool's gag we pulled in full:

IMPORTANT NOTICE
Templar Truths has been acquired by Temple Moor High School and its staff, who wish to publish the following statement:

Templar Truths has been, and is, potentially damaging to our school. It has eroded the pride and reputability of Temple Moor as a scholarly institution. This can no longer be the case, our image has been unfairly defamed and branded as "epic fail" for too long now.

The writers have yet to be punished, but are likely to face expulsion for their devious crimes against our establishment. We hope you, their readers, now understand the true villainy of what was afoot here. We hope you realise that Temple Moor is a wonderful establishment.

It will take a while to undo the cyberspace damage of this weblog, so bear with us as we delete the previous posts, change the style of the blog and erase all the defamatory comments made. Thank you in advance for your support of Temple Moor.

Contribute: send us any tales of Easter school idiocy!